Cozumel: Traditional Pole-Dancing − 24 January, 1999
About a week ago we stumbled across an Apple Vacations ad in the Sunday paper. It was one of those last-minute, all-inclusive packages to a resort in Cozumel, Mexico, and it was way too good a deal to pass up. Plus, we were ready for some tropical sun and a chance to scuba dive in warm water. Not to mention ditching work for a week.
My brother drove us to the Denver airport from Colorado Springs. We treated him to breakfast on the way -- it was the least we could do, since he drove us, was house-sitting for us, and taking care of our dog and cockatiel while we were gone. He did all that just for a breakfast at Denny's. Sucker.
It was an early flight, but that didn't stop them from serving all the passengers margaritas before takeoff. Mexicana airlines isn't what I'd call a posh airlines, but I'll give them credit for juicing up the passengers on a 7am flight! It was an honest-to-god drunk-fest on the plane. Now that's a party!
When we landed at Cozumel, we did a double-take upon seeing all the Mexican Federales roaming the airport. This was something new to me: most countries are much more visible with their armed forces in the airports. Don't know if that's a sight I'll ever get used to. We were the first ones that made it through Customs -- we managed to avoid the "random" red light that signaled we would be searched. (Some poor woman and her four little kids got stopped.) The passport agent did a bit of a double-take when we showed him our military ID cards. In retrospect, that was an incredibly stupid move on our parts. Should have left those things at home. What the fuck were we thinking?!
Though we were the first through Customs, we were the last to get our luggage off the carousel. Somehow, that always seems to be our lot when traveling by air -- our shit is always the last off the plane.
We snagged the first cabbie that accosted us outside the airport. Nice enough guy, but holy shit! Where do these guys learn to drive? Down at the local speedway? The pucker factor was high all the way to the resort.
We arrived at the Crown Paradise resort around noon. Wow. The lobby was one of those huge, open-air affairs that just reeked of tropical-ness. After checking in, we changed into island attire and explored the resort. We ended up sitting in on one of those orientations put on by the concierge and made note of some of the tours and activities that sounded interesting.
Across the street from the resort was the Aquaworld dive shop. Now that's convenient! No need to brave the local transportation to get to a dive shop in San Miguel. We looked over the dives offered by the shop and spoke to a few of the dive masters. Oh, man, we could drop a lot of cash here...
We settled onto a little patch of sand on the "beach" nearby. Cozumel doesn't have much in the way of beaches, and this little plot was man-made. It was property of the Crown Paradise, so it wasn't crowded, which was nice. We sipped drinks as we planned out the rest of our stay. So much to do and see, so little time. This would be a recurring problem in our future travels.
That night, we went to the dinner and show at the resort. Dinner was fairly light, mostly vegetables, fruit, and seafood. The show was... interesting. It was supposed to be a stunning, visual feast of traditional dances and costumes. It came across as soft-core porn meets the Keystone Cops. Some of the dancers clearly needed more practice; one guy nearly dropped his partner on another couple and one of the younger girls slipped off the stage (and didn't return). The dances were something else entirely. I seriously question whether some of these were "traditional" dances; one looked so much like strippers doing a pole-dance that I swear I saw some guy near the stage waving a dollar bill.
Might not have been truly authentic, be we sure had a good time.
My brother drove us to the Denver airport from Colorado Springs. We treated him to breakfast on the way -- it was the least we could do, since he drove us, was house-sitting for us, and taking care of our dog and cockatiel while we were gone. He did all that just for a breakfast at Denny's. Sucker.
It was an early flight, but that didn't stop them from serving all the passengers margaritas before takeoff. Mexicana airlines isn't what I'd call a posh airlines, but I'll give them credit for juicing up the passengers on a 7am flight! It was an honest-to-god drunk-fest on the plane. Now that's a party!
When we landed at Cozumel, we did a double-take upon seeing all the Mexican Federales roaming the airport. This was something new to me: most countries are much more visible with their armed forces in the airports. Don't know if that's a sight I'll ever get used to. We were the first ones that made it through Customs -- we managed to avoid the "random" red light that signaled we would be searched. (Some poor woman and her four little kids got stopped.) The passport agent did a bit of a double-take when we showed him our military ID cards. In retrospect, that was an incredibly stupid move on our parts. Should have left those things at home. What the fuck were we thinking?!
Though we were the first through Customs, we were the last to get our luggage off the carousel. Somehow, that always seems to be our lot when traveling by air -- our shit is always the last off the plane.
We snagged the first cabbie that accosted us outside the airport. Nice enough guy, but holy shit! Where do these guys learn to drive? Down at the local speedway? The pucker factor was high all the way to the resort.
We arrived at the Crown Paradise resort around noon. Wow. The lobby was one of those huge, open-air affairs that just reeked of tropical-ness. After checking in, we changed into island attire and explored the resort. We ended up sitting in on one of those orientations put on by the concierge and made note of some of the tours and activities that sounded interesting.
Across the street from the resort was the Aquaworld dive shop. Now that's convenient! No need to brave the local transportation to get to a dive shop in San Miguel. We looked over the dives offered by the shop and spoke to a few of the dive masters. Oh, man, we could drop a lot of cash here...
We settled onto a little patch of sand on the "beach" nearby. Cozumel doesn't have much in the way of beaches, and this little plot was man-made. It was property of the Crown Paradise, so it wasn't crowded, which was nice. We sipped drinks as we planned out the rest of our stay. So much to do and see, so little time. This would be a recurring problem in our future travels.
That night, we went to the dinner and show at the resort. Dinner was fairly light, mostly vegetables, fruit, and seafood. The show was... interesting. It was supposed to be a stunning, visual feast of traditional dances and costumes. It came across as soft-core porn meets the Keystone Cops. Some of the dancers clearly needed more practice; one guy nearly dropped his partner on another couple and one of the younger girls slipped off the stage (and didn't return). The dances were something else entirely. I seriously question whether some of these were "traditional" dances; one looked so much like strippers doing a pole-dance that I swear I saw some guy near the stage waving a dollar bill.
Might not have been truly authentic, be we sure had a good time.
at the resort
Comments:
kga245 (August 10, 2007. 04:16am)
Sounds like a fun time.
intrepideddie (August 10, 2007. 05:51am)
It gets better... more to come!
kga245 (August 10, 2007. 04:22pm)
Let me guess -- Montezuma revenge?
intrepideddie (August 11, 2007. 12:10pm)
Ha-ha! No... through all our travels we've been incredibly lucky with that. But let's see... what else is coming up that happened on this trip? Getting bitten by a monkey, left behind by a dive boat, and serenaded by a toothless old man playing a guitar with only two strings. Good times. (Seriously. These situations and stories are why I love travel!)