Go ahead, try and surprise me − 17 April, 2008
Today is the day that a naked 53-year-old man burned to death in a forested park in my town. Investigators found "no accelerant in the area". This is the first time I have heard news about someone with burns on 100% of his body. He was still alive in the ambulance, but succumbed to his injuries. At first no one knew how he'd caught fire since his speech was unintelligible. It is now known that he was a long-time resident with mental issues. There is a sense of relief that we don’t have another serial killer on the loose as we did 15 years ago. But before this was known, I was shaken by the news. Now I am only sad for the departed.
I am left wondering how one can catch fire with no clothing and no accelerant. I suppose we will find out, but he was found in some brush, and right now there are plenty of dry leaves. I imagine a scenario somewhat like smoking in bed. Perhaps he was smoking in the brush and managed to catch the brush and himself on fire. He was said to appear to be a “smoldering pile” before he was recognized as human. This is probably the strangest thing I have heard about in my town in the twenty years I’ve lived here.
The only other story that comes close is of the woman who regularly allowed herself to be locked in her boyfriend’s car trunk while he went to work and ran errands. He would tell her that she needed to stay in the trunk, and she would simply comply. Apparently she saw nothing wrong with this bizarre practice. She was discovered, however, and the man was arrested.
Six years ago, I realized that it had become difficult to surprise me. I’d simply heard too many strange stories. These two stories, however, left me completely baffled.
I am left wondering how one can catch fire with no clothing and no accelerant. I suppose we will find out, but he was found in some brush, and right now there are plenty of dry leaves. I imagine a scenario somewhat like smoking in bed. Perhaps he was smoking in the brush and managed to catch the brush and himself on fire. He was said to appear to be a “smoldering pile” before he was recognized as human. This is probably the strangest thing I have heard about in my town in the twenty years I’ve lived here.
The only other story that comes close is of the woman who regularly allowed herself to be locked in her boyfriend’s car trunk while he went to work and ran errands. He would tell her that she needed to stay in the trunk, and she would simply comply. Apparently she saw nothing wrong with this bizarre practice. She was discovered, however, and the man was arrested.
Six years ago, I realized that it had become difficult to surprise me. I’d simply heard too many strange stories. These two stories, however, left me completely baffled.
Comments:
intrepideddie (April 17, 2008. 03:12am)
Have you ever seen a man eat his own head? ("Team America: World Police" --- sorry, I couldn't resist.)
PandoraBox (April 18, 2008. 03:10pm)
I am more shaken by the trunk story than by the burning story. Brr.
peahayes (April 19, 2008. 01:33am)
We learned that the "naked" man's clothes had burned off. So I bet my theory "smoking in bed" is right. As for the woman in the trunk, it'd be interesting to try to climb inside her skull-- to imagine what set of circumstances led her to the believe that it was OK.
peahayes (April 19, 2008. 03:58am)
Oh, yeah, to respond to the comment about "Team America": I am pretty hard to offend, but damn it, that movie offended me! I didn't want it to. I thought I was tough enough. But I cracked. I just squirmed in my seat at the horrifically un-P.C. bits... I laughed in some parts, but overall, it was a pretty awful movie. But at least I gave it a chance...