Attempting to Bond over Boobies − April, 1984
My dad unexpectedly asked me today if I'd like to go see the movie tonight. Note I said the movie; the theater in this town only had one screen. And it was only open on weekends.
Sounded good to me; and, as teens will do, I asked if my friend Aaron C could come along. Dad seemed a little miffed by that, but said he could join us.
Little did I know what movie was showing: Up the Creek. What's that? You've never heard of this movie? For shame! It was quite possibly one of the finest pieces of cinematography ever to grace the big screen.
Or not.
Basically, the movie was along the lines of Porky's, Ski Patrol, Revenge of the Nerds, etc... A bare hint of a plot used as an excuse to see some boobs. Hardly a step above soft porn.
Works for me.
The movie was entertaining for its sophomoric humor, but when the money shots came, I couldn't wait for them to end. It was excruciatingly uncomfortable to sit there next to my dad while tits and ass were parading across the screen.
I was raised Catholic. Not necessarily strict Catholic, but we went to church every Sunday. That may have played some small part in this, since the CCD (similar to Sunday School) teachers imparted to us that sexuality was a bad thing. Shocking, I know.
The other factor was life at home. Sexuality was never discussed. Ever. It's not that it was a forbidden topic or frowned upon, it was just never brought up. Mom and dad tended to shy away from those types of conversations around us kids.
So I sat there and squirmed in my seat through the scenes of wanton nakedness. Between dad and me, there was no laughing, or pointing, or comments like "Did you see the hooters bouncing on that one?"
In hindsight, I believe my dad wanted to have a bit of male bonding with his oldest son. You know, just the guys going out to see a funny, raunchy movie. I don't think it quite turned out the way either of us expected.
As an aside, there was some additional entertainment other than the movie. My friend, Aaron, loved Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. He always had several of them any time we went to the movies. This night was no different.
About 3/4 of the way through the movie, I glanced over at him as he was unwrapping yet another peanut butter cup. As he started into the second one, I noticed something moving in the wrapper. I squinted, but couldn't quite make it out in the dark theater, so I elbowed him and pointed at the wrapper.
He brought it up and we both had a closer look. There on the wrapper was a whole mess of tiny maggots, writhing around in anger that their meal had been taken away (and probably with some of their relatives).
Aaron immediately turned green and bolted for the bathroom.
I may have been uncomfortable sitting next to my dad watching naked blondes cavort across the screen, but at least I didn't down a handful of bugs with a chocolate and peanut butter chaser.
Sounded good to me; and, as teens will do, I asked if my friend Aaron C could come along. Dad seemed a little miffed by that, but said he could join us.
Little did I know what movie was showing: Up the Creek. What's that? You've never heard of this movie? For shame! It was quite possibly one of the finest pieces of cinematography ever to grace the big screen.
Or not.
Basically, the movie was along the lines of Porky's, Ski Patrol, Revenge of the Nerds, etc... A bare hint of a plot used as an excuse to see some boobs. Hardly a step above soft porn.
Works for me.
The movie was entertaining for its sophomoric humor, but when the money shots came, I couldn't wait for them to end. It was excruciatingly uncomfortable to sit there next to my dad while tits and ass were parading across the screen.
I was raised Catholic. Not necessarily strict Catholic, but we went to church every Sunday. That may have played some small part in this, since the CCD (similar to Sunday School) teachers imparted to us that sexuality was a bad thing. Shocking, I know.
The other factor was life at home. Sexuality was never discussed. Ever. It's not that it was a forbidden topic or frowned upon, it was just never brought up. Mom and dad tended to shy away from those types of conversations around us kids.
So I sat there and squirmed in my seat through the scenes of wanton nakedness. Between dad and me, there was no laughing, or pointing, or comments like "Did you see the hooters bouncing on that one?"
In hindsight, I believe my dad wanted to have a bit of male bonding with his oldest son. You know, just the guys going out to see a funny, raunchy movie. I don't think it quite turned out the way either of us expected.
As an aside, there was some additional entertainment other than the movie. My friend, Aaron, loved Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. He always had several of them any time we went to the movies. This night was no different.
About 3/4 of the way through the movie, I glanced over at him as he was unwrapping yet another peanut butter cup. As he started into the second one, I noticed something moving in the wrapper. I squinted, but couldn't quite make it out in the dark theater, so I elbowed him and pointed at the wrapper.
He brought it up and we both had a closer look. There on the wrapper was a whole mess of tiny maggots, writhing around in anger that their meal had been taken away (and probably with some of their relatives).
Aaron immediately turned green and bolted for the bathroom.
I may have been uncomfortable sitting next to my dad watching naked blondes cavort across the screen, but at least I didn't down a handful of bugs with a chocolate and peanut butter chaser.
Comments:
peahayes (April 22, 2008. 02:44am)
Oh, yes, this reminds me of sitting in a dark theater watching the very naked and pregnant Helen Mirren as Morgana in "Excalibur". I have never felt so embarrassed and uncomfortable around my dad. I wonder whether he felt equally embarrassed...
intrepideddie (April 22, 2008. 02:49am)
Huh, that's funny... I never noticed any nudity in "Excalibur." I was focused on that spleen dangling at the end of the spear as it was thrust through some hapless knight. Damn cool movie.
stretch65 (April 22, 2008. 03:49pm)
Gee, I wonder if your dad remembers this movie? I'm sure he didn't tell your mother about it.
peahayes (April 22, 2008. 04:35pm)
Knowing my dad, he doesn't remember. Half the time his mind is another place. He's a philosopher.
intrepideddie (April 23, 2008. 12:08am)
That's funny. Sounds an awful lot like my dad.
peahayes (April 23, 2008. 02:07am)
Eddie, the more I learn about you, the more we have in common.