perfect life − 27 June, 2008
Today i wished away another day of my short and precious life, i do not want to work in a shop forever. Not because its boring, or because it think i am better than that but just because i want something else. I was bored on lunch today and as i was sat in Castle Gardens thinking how beautiful the view actually was at this point in time (with the sun shining, various clouds scattered around the blue sky, the castle adding a touch of history and people relaxing on the grass.) I started to wonder what my perfect life would be like, if i look forward say five years...what is it that i have, if i had everything i wanted?! What would actually make me happy? I admit it, i am a dreamer, i go through life dreaming about the possibilities...i never stick at anything and then complain about the situation i am in. Basically i always thought that by the time i got to 21 i would have it all worked out, i would be in a great relationship, i would still be at college, i wouldnt have lost lots of my friends...things would just be different, but things need to be steered in the right direction and thats where i have been going wrong, the problem being that i dont know where i am steering them. So i am sat in castle gardens at around 1.30 this afternoon drinking a can of red bull and smoking a marlboro light when i start to wonder what it is i really want...here is what i came up with when imaging my perfect life five years from now...
I want a boyfriend but not just any old boyfriend but the boyfriend, i dont see the point in wasting my time with someone who isnt my first, my last, my everything...or however the song goes!
I want a job that i love, during the short time i gave myself to think about what it is i want to do i decided on a teacher or a writer of some kind, i love writing.
I want to be moved out, i love my family to pieces but some independence would be nice and not relying on other people. So yeh...some swanky apartment would be nice, then when i get older and have babies i can move in the the countryside...though that probably means i should learn how to drive.
I want my friends to stick around, i have lost too many people over the past...well the past 21 years, i dont intend on losing anymore.
So thats pretty much what i came up with...it all sounds pretty good to me...just got to work out how to get there. I am looking in to courses and stuff for next year, just going to take some mental time out now to decide what it truely is that i want.
Anyways i am chronically tired so going to have a bath and put my pjs on!
Comments:
peahayes (June 29, 2008. 03:44am)
excellent goals. Learn patience along the way. To get to "the" boyfriend you may have to go through a few others. You wouldn't be a failure if you didn't accomplish all of this in five years.